Should One Always R.S.V.P. To An Invitation?

Robin Thompson, owner of Etiquette Network and the Robin Thompson Charm School, says, "An R.S.V.P. is basically saying, 'Will you come to my party?' If your friend calls you up and says, 'I am having a party Friday night, would you attend?' you would say yes or no. Your response would not be stony silence. So, anytime you get an R.S.V.P., imagine that the person is standing there waiting for your response."



Be considerate of your hostess. "Knowing if a guest will attend is just as important as knowing if a guest will not attend," Thompson says, "because the hostess needs a head count for food, drinks, seating, and entertainment. Also, you shouldn't show up with extra guests. If the invitation is addressed to Robin Thompson and Guest, then, yes, you may bring a guest, but if the invitation is addressed only to Robin Thompson, then you should not invite a guest. Did you know, the response or R.S.V.P. rate for wedding invitations is 25% to 50% tops? Not responding is very inconsiderate and rude. An R.S.V.P. should be responded to the day you receive it if possible, and within five to seven days at the very latest."

In Emily Post's Etiquette, 17th Edition, Peggy Post, who is the great-granddaughter-in-law of the famous Emily Post, agrees that you must respond "promptly" if "an invitation includes a request for a reply." A request for a reply could be "R.S.V.P.," or it could be "Please reply," or it could be "The favor of a reply is requested," or any similar notation on an invitation. However, if the invitation says "Regrets only," then the recipient only has to reply if he or she is not planning to attend.

Post gives four guidelines for responding to invitations. The first is that you should "respond in a timely fashion." A timely fashion would be within a few days if you are responding to a written invitation, unless the invitation specifically says to reply by a certain date. If you receive an invitation on the phone or face-to-face, you may accept or decline the invitation on the spot, but "it's acceptable to delay your response until you've checked your schedule or cleared the day with anyone else included in the invitation." Post says, "Just tell the person that you will call as soon as possible, then follow up within a day or two."

Post's second guideline is to "reply in the manner indicated on the invitation." If the hostess wants you to e-mail your reply, she will include an e-mail address as part of the R.S.V.P. Same thing with a phone number, if she wants you to call. If there is a reply card included, then use that. But if no special information is included with the R.S.V.P., then you should send a handwritten note.

Post's third guideline is to "keep replies brief." Just get to the point. Post says you are not obligated to make any excuses when you decline an invitation, and that if you do want to explain, you don't need to go into any detail.

Post's fourth guideline is to "reply even if you have a potential conflict." If you think that you may not be able to make it, but you aren't sure yet and you need more time, you can simply explain the situation to the hostess if it's an informal event, asking her if it's okay if you can give a definite answer a little bit later. For a formal event like a wedding, though, where asking for more time might create problems for the hostess, it's probably better to just decline.


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Wedding Planning: Filipino Wedding Traditions

In the Philippines there are many unique wedding traditions, some which originate from Spanish missionaries who visited the country early in the 18th century. Many of these traditions are drawn from the dominant Christian religion of the Philippines, Catholicism. Kasalan is the Filipino word for Wedding.
Unlike in the United States where the bride's family pays for the wedding, in the Philippines, expenses are paid for by the groom's family. The bride's gown is custom-made rather than bought ready made off the rack. Both the bride and groom wear white, with the groom wearing a traditional transparent button-up shirt.
Wedding invitations cover both the ceremony and the reception; therefore reception cards are not used. Also included in the wedding invitation is a page that gives all the names and roles of those in the bridal party. In the Philippines, the most popular month for a wedding is December, as opposed to June in the United States.
The bride and groom arrive separately and at different times for the ceremony. The groom arrives up to an hour before hand to receive guests. The bride however, arrives just in time for her bridal march. Both the bride and the groom march down the aisle, the groom either alone or with his parents.
The marrying couple picks a few pairs of ninongs and ninangs (godparents) to be the primary sponsors/witnesses of the ceremony. In addition to the bridesmaids and groomsmen, three pairs of wedding attendants act as secondary sponsors who manage the wedding candles, veil and cord ceremonies which make take place during the nuptial mass. The bride holds an heirloom rosary along with the bridal bouquet during the ceremony. Generally the wedding ceremony includes a full mass which runs about an hour.
In addition to exchanging rings, the groom gives his bride an arrhae, which is a monetary gift in the form of thirteen pieces of gold or silver coins. This is a pledge from the groom of his dedication to the welfare of his wife and children. The arrhae is carried by a coin bearer who walks alongside the ring bearer for both the processional and recessional.
Candles stand on each side of the couple. Candle attendants light these candles which symbolize God's presence in the union. Some couples integrate the lighting of a Unity candle into the service. The Unity candle has its origins in the Protestant religion. After the candles are lit, veil sponsors drape a long white tulle veil on the grooms shoulder and pin it. Another veil is then draped over the bride's head. The veils are used to symbolize two people who are "˜clothed' as one.
The last pair of sponsors stands with a cord in the form of a figure eight and place one loop around the neck-shoulder area of the bride and the other loop around the neck-shoulder area of the groom. The cord symbolizes the infinite bond of the marriage. This cord can be a silken rope or made from a string of flowers or links of coins.
After the ceremony, during the reception, a pair of white doves is released by the newlyweds to signify peace and harmony during the marriage. Whoever catches them takes them home as a pet. Instead of tossing of the bouquet, the bride instead offers the flowers to a favorite Saint or the Virgin Mary. Some opt to place the bouquet on the grave of a lost love one.
Traditional Filipino weddings are very strong in the faith, emphasizing God in every part of the ceremony and inviting Him into their lives. Also, every part of the ceremony emphasizes the joining of two people as one in a life long commitment of love and caring.

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Your Guide to Sending Wedding Invitations

Addressing your wedding invitations can be a daunting task. How should one writes ones name? How should one address a couple that is living together but not married? How should one address siblings or children invited to the wedding? It all seems so confusing at first glance.

Take a deep breath and calm yourself. First you need to decide what sort of wedding you are having. Is it a formal wedding with a lot of attendants? Or is it a simple affair with friends and family?

Formal

I have seen wedding invitations done in many different ways. All were perfectly acceptable according to the type of wedding. If you are having a formal wedding then you will want your invitations to reflect your wedding style in a more formal manner using the more appropriate titles such as: Dr. and Mrs. John Smith. If the woman is the doctor then you would want to put Dr. Jane Smith and Mr. John Smith.

Informal

If your wedding is more of a simple affair you might wish to eliminate titles all together and that is fine too. John and Jane Smith or perhaps, John Smith and Jane Smith.

Including children

If you wish to include children under 18 at your wedding you could put something like John and Jane Smith and family or perhaps they only have one child you could put John and Jane Smith and Emily.

Children over 18 should get their own invitations even if they are still living at home.

Couples, living together or same sex friends

For couples living together you can address your invitation in any of the following ways, just be consistent. If you are closer to one person over another you may put that name first. Miss Sara Smith and Mr. John Brown. Or, you could do it alphabetical. Either way make sure that both names are on the invitation. Mr. John Brown and Miss Sara Smith. Both ways are perfectly acceptable.

Retirees

If you are inviting someone that is retired or currently active in the military find out their rank and address the invitation accordingly. General John Smith and Mrs. John Smith is very appropriate for this invitation.

If you are inviting a minister or retired minister then you would want, Reverend or Pastor John Smith and Mrs. John Smith. Or even simply Pastor and Mrs. Smith. Either is appropriate just make sure you are consistent.

Whatever style wedding you are having your invitations say a lot about you. Whether its a flyer, a postcard or a more formal invitation with fancy calligraphy writing, take a moment to properly address your invitation and make a good first impression.

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Share Your Love with Romantic Beach Wedding Invitations

What are the Different Types of Wedding Invitation Envelopes?

Choosing invitations is an integral part of planning a wedding. However, choosing the wedding invitations is also an important process. The wedding invitation envelopes are the first things that prospective guests will see, so a bride is well advised to choose envelopes that are tasteful and may reflect the colors or theme of the wedding.

Wedding invitation envelopes come in many shapes, sizes and designs. The most traditional design is the larger, heavier outer envelope, with a smaller envelope containing the actual invitation enclosed. The double envelope is a tradition with an interesting story. Before the 20th century, almost all wedding invitations were hand-delivered to their recipients and in the early 18th century, most of those who actually sent engraved invitations were of the upper class. The recipient's butler would take the (probably dirty) envelope from the courier, open it and present the neat, clean inner envelope to the lady of the house. Thus was a tradition born that continues even now.

A bride may go to a local bridal salon, printer, or online to choose wedding invitation envelopes. Her choices are nearly endless. She can choose envelopes made of heavy paper, parchment, vellum, and in square or rectangular shapes. One shape that is becoming more popular in wedding invitation envelopes is the "pochette." This is an envelope that is shaped like a square, with folding tabs on each side, which fold in to make the envelope. Wedding invitation envelopes are available in almost any color imaginable, and a bride may even be able to match her envelopes with the colors of her bouquet, if she desires to do so.

Some wedding invitation envelopes are plain, inside and out, but a bride may choose ones lined in foil, again in an array of colors. She can match the foil lining to the ink color used on the invitation, or choose a complimentary color to the paper.

One very formal, traditional version of wedding invitation envelopes is an envelope made of parchment. This is heavy paper with a subtle marbled finish. Parchment often features a "deckled" edge, which means the edge of the paper has a torn look, giving it a handmade appearance. Parchment is considered one of the most attractive forms of wedding invitation envelopes.

Etiquette demands that wedding invitation envelopes may be engraved or preferably, hand-addressed. While envelopes addressed on a computer printer, or with address labels may be gaining popularity, sticklers for proper etiquette still say hand-addressed are the best.

Most wedding invitation envelopes come as a "package" price with the invitations themselves. However, a bride will usually pay extra for lined, parchment or vellum envelopes, and these fees will be listed with the invitation prices. Ordering invitations and envelopes early ensures that the bride can make corrections if something is amiss with the finished product, so this process should be near the top of a bride's "to-do" list. Comparing prices from various sources will ensure she is able to find what she wants at the best price.

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Share Your Love with Romantic Beach Wedding Invitations

Beach wedding invitations can be perfect for tropical, destination and, of course, beach weddings. What is more romantic than exchanging your vows on a beautiful beach with soft sand beneath your feet and the gentle sound of waves rolling in and out. Your setting may even include an awesome sunset over the horizon. The good news is that these amazing scenes can be captured and shared with guests through your wedding invitations.

Here are some ideas on how to share the romance of your wedding by mailing out themed beach wedding invitations:

• Colors - Common shades that come to mind are greens for the palm leaves, blues and aquas for the crystal clear waters, vibrant colors for the beautiful tropical flowers, and pearl whites for the unique seashells.
• Shapes - If you are looking to have some fun, you may find unique shapes of wedding invites such as beach chairs, flip flops, airplane tickets, etc. This type of invitation would certainly surprise and delight your guests.
• Design graphics - The beach theme can be illustrated by picturesque palm trees or lush leaves, a sunny beach scene, bright tropical flowers, shimmery seashells or maybe a couple amidst a romantic seaside setting.
• Photography - What could be more genuine than a picture on the front of your invitation resembling a beach scene photo like a sunset or a heart drawn in the sand.

Depending on the style of your wedding, your beach invitations may be formal or more on the casual side. A more casual invite may be appropriate if you are planning a small destination ceremony followed by a post-wedding reception when returning home.

In keeping with your theme, you will also find a great selection of beach save the date magnets and cards if you will be announcing your wedding ahead of your actual invitation. This is often a good idea when having a wedding that will involve your guests traveling to a destination.

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Choosing Wedding Invitations,how?!

How to Create Maps for Wedding Invitations?

Weddings are happy occasions for almost everyone--except for lost guests. Keep your guests happy with a map that directs them to the ceremony, where to park and, ideally, to the reception as well.
          * 1
            Write down all the stops that you want to provide directions to. Because guests typically come from all over, it may be best to start from the major freeway closest to your ceremony site and map the location from there.
          * 2
            Determine what other locations you want to list on your map, including your reception site (if it's different from your ceremony site), nearby hotels, your rehearsal dinner location, morning-after brunch, etc. This can be done easily if all of these events are in the same general area.
          * 3
            Visit the Wedding Planner website and create a free account.
          * 4
            Plug in the addresses of the various stops you want to map. Add pictures and icons (the Wedding Planner website allows you to flag your locations on your map with little limos, wedding cakes, hairdryers, etc.) to represent the various venues to provide more detail.
          * 5
            Play around with the way your map looks until you are happy with the amount of data you provided and the way it is displayed. Print out a couple test pages (it's under Print/Directions, For Your Invitations) to obtain the appropriate size.
          * 6
            Determine whether you want to add extra information to the invitations, such as what streets are one-way, where to park, what street means you've gone too far, alternative directions in case of street closures and other such details.
          * 7
            Print your maps on the paper you desire and cut them into an appropriate size. Include in your wedding invitations.


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How To Help the Bride Make Wedding Invitations

Choosing Wedding Invitations,how?!

How To Help the Bride Make Wedding Invitations

So your friend or sister is getting married and you’d like to help. Where can you start? One area where the bride may need assistance is with making the wedding invitations. You don’t have to be a professional printer to make quality invitations. Here are some things you can do to lend a helping hand to the bride to be.

• Talk to the bride. Before taking initiative with anything, talk to the bride first. Volunteer what you are willing to do, such as drive her to the printers, or help her pick out designs for the invitations. Be clear who’s paying for the invitation. If you say you are willing to help, clarify if that means you want to shoulder the expense for it, subsidize the expense, or if you will just help her get it done.
• Follow the bride’s guide. Keep in mind that this is her wedding, not yours, so the final decision has to be hers. You may not always agree with her design choices, but you must comply. For example, if you prefer a clean white sheet of paper but the bride prefers something in ivory with more elaborate border design, let her have her way.
• Make the guest list together. You’ll need to know how many people you need to send an invitation to, so spend an afternoon together going over a list of family and friends. Let this be the guide as to how many invites you’ll need.
• Help the bride canvass different printers. Based on your research, you may both decide whether it will be more cost effective to buy your own stationary paper and have the invites printed at a copier or use your own printer. If you have a good laser printer, you may offer to print the invitations yourself. This should greatly reduce the cost of printing instead of going to a professional printer. What bride wouldn’t appreciate saving money?
• Offer to proofread. Sometimes, it takes an impartial eye to proofread things so you can catch misspells that a harassed and busy bride may overlook.
• Put the invitation together. A typical invitation will have the main announcement card, a small RSVP card, a return envelope, the main envelope, and if it will be mailed, the outside envelope. Some invitations even have a seal or sticker placed on the main envelope. You can help make an assembly line putting things together for the bride, you may even ask a few more friends to help out. Make sure your hands are clean, and be careful of paper cuts!
• Address the envelopes. If you have neat and beautiful handwriting, offer to write out the names. You may even have some calligraphy skills, which will add a special touch to the invitations.

Offer the bride whatever help you can to help make her day special. She’ll appreciate the help, you’ll aid her save money, and it will add to the special memories she’ll have with her wedding.

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Choosing Wedding Invitations,how?!

Homemade Wedding Invitations

Choosing Wedding Invitations,how?!

Why is careful consideration of wedding invitations important?

Wedding invitations set the tone for the rest of the wedding and establish a motif or theme that can be carried throughout the rest of the wedding décor, from place cards to table numbers to programs, favors, and food packaging. Some of the best weddings we've been involved in designing are full of these personal details, and it often all starts with the invitation.

Why not just use plain invitations?

While it can be more economical to purchase off-the-shelf invitations from a stationery or office supply store, there are several things to keep in mind. First, the quality from some vendors can be poor, as many print-at-home invitations are made to be both extremely affordable, and printable on any (read: the bottom-of-the-line) home printer, which means that the paper can be quite thin, and you might end up with slight perforation marks where, say, an RSVP card is punched out of the template provided.
In addition, it's important to keep in mind the time, expense, and design limitations that can result from printing invitations at home. You'll need to factor in layout time, as well as the cost of ink cartridges and custom fonts, if desired; and note that a typical word processing program has less flexibility in terms of typesetting than professional design program.
Given that digital printing and online ordering have recently made custom invitations more affordable than ever before, it's important be aware of the pros and cons before making a decision.

Can custom invitations be affordable?

Absolutely. Recent developments in digital printing technology mean that you can now get a high quality, full-color print on nice, thick paper in very little time at all (standard turnaround times for custom digital printing range from three to seven business days from proof approval).
Many wedding invitation retailers (particularly those on-line) offer a huge range of designs to choose from, so even if you're not getting something designed especially for you, you can typically find a design that matches the color scheme, look and feel of your wedding. What's more, since most invitation designers offer so many customization options (colors, fonts, etc.), it's unlikely that your wedding invitation will look the same as someone else's, even if you start with the same template.

What else should be ordered with the invitations?

It is often a good idea to order thank you notes with invitations, as you may receive gifts as soon as the invitations are mailed, if not before.If you are working with a boutique stationer that is able to provide hands-on service, it is a good idea to get a quote upfront for the rest of your wedding day paper needs, such as programs, menus, and place cards, so you can budget and plan accordingly. Have the stationer keep the quote on file, and initiate the actual ordering of these items one to two months before the wedding. Remember to always confirm final quantities, as these may change as the wedding day approaches. Many stationers offer discounts to wedding invitation customers who return for their day-of wedding stationery.

What are some rules of thumb for choosing wedding invitations?

• Choose one or two fonts, and stick with them throughout all your wedding paper.
• Be careful to choose fonts and ink colors that are legible. Make the words big enough for elderly relatives to read, and always print text in a dark ink color.
• Inner and outer envelopes, while once the norm with wedding invitations, are no longer necessary. Save paper and money by sending your invitations in single envelopes.
• Never use office labels to address your invitations. Hand address them (setting aside time to do so), hire a calligrapher, or find a stationer that can print custom designed labels for you.
• Remember to weigh your invitations. Keep in mind that square invitations and invitations with a hard element (e.g. button closure, charm, etc.) are subject to additional postage charges.
• Be sure to leave yourself enough time to order your invitations, particularly if you are ordering a custom design or artisan form of printing. Mistakes happen when you (or your printer) are in a rush.

Anything else you'd like to add?

Remember that your invitation sets the tone for the rest of your wedding, so think ahead to how your invitation's motifs and colors will flow through the rest of your wedding's design. Choose a palette of three to five colors (a couple of dominant colors, and a couple of accent colors) to bring cohesion to the event, and use consistent typefaces and designs.